Wednesday, July 4, 2018

Are We Teaching Our Children The Difference Between Earning and Entitlement?

EARN: to receive as return for effort and especially for work done or services rendered

ENTITLE: to give a right to

Almost daily I witness children who seem to not know the difference between the two definitions which opens this post. I see behavior exhibited by children in schools, grocery stores, shopping malls, parks, churches, and just about anywhere else that you will find parents or caregivers with children that lead me to believe that either the children were never taught the difference or they didn't grasp the lesson. I see children throwing temper tantrums while well-meaning adults feebly attempt to explain why they are saying no or why the child is not going to get his/her way, only to acquiesce and ultimately give the child what he/she was throwing the tantrum about.  It baffles me that more parents do not realize that they are perpetuating the very behavior that they do not want every time they give in and allow the child to get what he/she wants as a result of the tantrum or inappropriate behavior. As parents, we send the wrong message to the child leading him/her to believe that the world owes them something and all they have to do to get it is to holler or cry the loudest; pout; roll on the floor; kick and scream; persistently whine and the list can go on. We reinforce this behavior every time we give in and not allow our "No" to remain "No."

There are two key words underlined and bolded in the definitions above that are the key to this post. Children must learn that they must earn whatever it is that they want in life and that for the most part, no one is going to just give them whatever they want just because they want it.  It is downright frustrating to watch this child-parent exchange and have to wonder who the parent is. We are setting our children up to fail in a society that is not going to give them what they want just because they holler, kick, curse and scream. Salaries are earned. Promotions are earned. Degrees are earned. Licenses are earned and so forth and so on. I hope you get the picture. Nothing is given and yet those with the sense of entitlement believe that it ought to be. They believe and have been taught to believe (by our response) that no effort on their part needs to happen and they are to still receive whatever it is that they are looking to receive. No effort on their part whatsoever. Just like that child in the grocery store at the check out line, it's "Give me, give me, give me."

Parents, our "No" must mean "No" and our children need to understand that our "No" means "No" and learn to cut the drama. If we continue down this path, it will not bode well for society as we will have a spoiled generation (if we don't already have one) of people who believe the world owes them something when in reality it does not. The blank writing tablet depicted in the photo with the heading above it which reads "Here is a comprehensive of everything you're entitled to and what the world owes you," says it best.  We must teach our children (and some adults) this or we are all going to suffer in the end. 

Would love to hear your thoughts or experiences with this in the comment section and I invite you to join me live each Saturday from 6 - 9 a.m. Eastern time as I webstream around the world on gobrave.org and broadcast locally in the metropolitan area on FM radio WP88.7 FM. I also invite you to follow me on Twitter @thinkcritical01 and/or @readingcircle01.



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